Learning to pound pizza dough is as close to a fast-food job as I got. Of course, there are those that will debate me on pizza as fast-food, but considering the quantity of it that I consumed while working for Domino's, there is a pretty good chance that it is one of the reasons that a Doctor suggested that I steer clear of gluten, wheat and dairy. Let's just say that with a request like that, it's pretty easy to see why I had high blood-pressure until I changed Doctors.
Don't get me wrong, I still like pizza. It should be a mandatory food group all it's own. Required Eating as far as I am concerned. Yet, as much as I may not have liked my former Doctor's advice, it's actually pretty good advice. When I did make an effort to cut down on wheat consumption, I noticed a difference. I switched from regular pasta to rice noodles, and learned to make all sorts of interesting dishes. All of them were fantastic, provided that I took the time to make the effort. But none of them were pizza. I was trained to make pizza. I love pizza.
Now, is Domino's Pizza, Fast Food? Well, it all depends on what you order. Get a pizza with lite sauce and lite cheese, and every vegetable on the menu, and you've got a pretty healthy pizza. Switch it over to a cholesterol fest that needs 3 paper plates just to keep your jeans clean (as if you care) as the oils from the cheese and sausages drip through the cuts, soak the crust, and make you wonder if there is a spill containment kit handy. Seriously, we're talking about a pizza so oily that it completely soaks through the box and makes a red pepperoni oil-slick on the counter. You order it, we'll make it. For the 2C3P2L (*), I suggest the thick crust, but if you want regular or thin, well, you're the customer. We don't deliver napkins.
I also got to sample a number of different pizzas. There was a ritual pizza that was known as the "Crew Pie." On a busy night, there would be an lull when there were no phones ringing, and all of the drivers were out of the store. Just the crew and the manager. Since I was working inside detail, and got to anchor the makeline once in a while, I got a chance to make a crew pie. The manager gave me a few guidelines, but basically, you could make a free pizza. The food costs were going to support a little good will. Besides, I was a college student. I was hungry.
As I whipped out a masterpiece of pizza perfection, the phone rang. One of the girls grabbed it on the start of the second ring, and took the order. I put the pizza on the slow-moving belt of the CTX oven for it's 4 minute and 54 second trip to golden crispy goodness. Then another phone rang and a returning driver pounced on it as I lumbered over to the dough station to grab the tag that was just about done being written.
By the end of the next wave of the rush, two or three drivers were still in the back. One munching on a piece of crust, and the other folding a stack of boxes. I glanced at the end of the sink where we always put the crew pie, looking for the box. No Box. In the trash, a box without a label, and cut marks. Empty. I was a college student, and I was still hungry. I managed a polite chat with the manager, and he looked up with a sheepish grin which broke into a smile.
"Do like Anchovies?"
I shook my head. I could barely handle touching those slimy things when they were fresh from the can, and if they had been in a half-gallon container for a week, forget it. You just tossed then entire container, since it was useless for anything, including a new can of 'chovies. Eat Them? No.
"Well, then you'd better learn to like Jalapenos then."
Great. Sliced Pickled Jalapenos with the seeds, and the middle. I had a choice. Stinky Fish or Hot Peppers. Not something safe and sane like an Italian Pepperoncini, no, it had to be Jalapenos. Curse the Spanish for having been here first. Jalapenos. So, in my frustration, I walked over to the makeline, and selected a pristine wheel of Jalapeno. It looked so nice, and it started out so tangy that I thought it might be a joke.
I chewed. I coughed. I chewed and swallowed. I burned. I had a pizza to make. My eyes watered. I almost ripped the dough-skin. The sauce nearly hit the edge of the pizza. I was shaking so hard that the cheese left my hands effortlessly and fell correctly, and I hardly noticed from the pain in my mouth and throat.
The anguish started to subside. I managed to finish making the pizza and snag a slice of Salami in the process. Perhaps I would be able to taste it. All I could hope was that the manager was not looking at the time. From his desk, through one-way glass, he could look straight down the makeline and watch the pizzas move toward his window, make a right turn, and go into the oven. He was also on the lookout for hand-to-mouth moves.
The next day, I made it a point to discretely interview and recall what toppings people hated the most, and my manager was correct. Anchivies and Japaneno were at the top of the list, as was Pineappple. As one of the most expensive items on the makeline, it was discouraged on crew pies, but could appear, sparingly, on half. Essentially, it was a 1/4 portion. In my case, it was a necessity.
Gathering intelligence as I had, I discovered that the big eater in driver pool had no problem with hot food, but just choked on pineapple. This meant that I had to use pineapple on crew pies, just to keep this guy limited to half of the pizza. My trick was to cross, half the pizza with Jalapenos. This way, there was a quarter of the pie that was both Pineapple and Jalapeno. To keep the drivers from picking off the toppings, I put half of the cheese on top of the toppings.
The top cheese was interesting for a few reasons. First, it was not standard practice, so the pizza was not sellable. It did not meet the standard for construction. It was a deviation. Second, the cheese browned in the presence of Pineapple. Normally, if you slop the Pineapple onto a pizza using the standard technique of middle-out building (and clearing out the middle), you get white cheese. Always. The pineapple juice prevents the cheese from bubbling and browning. It is for this reason that Pineapple was not a corporate item, but was optional at the franchise locations.
There are no rules for the crew pie. Not when I make it. This time, everything went just like before. The lul, the pie, the phone, the mini rush, and the drivers in the back room, one folding boxes, the other pissed. There's one slice left on the open pizza box at the end of the counter. Yellow and green under melted cheese, with other good stuff too. Like pepperoni and black olives, with a smattering of mushrooms. Sometimes it's good to break the rules.
* Double Cheese, Triple Pepperoni and Double Salami
January 26, 2010
January 20, 2010
Two Minutes to Pepperoni
I would prefer not to list the reasons for taking a job working for Domino's Pizza at the age of Eighteen. Suffice to say, you do what you have to do, and I met the requirements for a driving position. At the time I had a car that was seat belt exempt, which meant that I could beat my fellow drivers to the door in the hustle. Yes, this was back in the 30 minute days of Domino's, but it was just $3.00 off, not a free pizza.
While I was hanging out in the small waiting area, waiting for a chance to chat with the manager. Frankly, I needed to pick up a second job at the time so I could save up the cash I needed to pay for my first semester in College. You see, I was going to have to enroll, and the Pizza gig might work well, since there was flexibility in the schedule. That, and the fact that getting up at false dawn every morning for my other job was just not going to work.
So I kept myself occupied, and learned the ordering code. I watched the slips move from the order sheet to the make-line and onto the boxes. An organization that is going to deliver pizza in under 30 minutes has to be exactly that: Organized. Expecting them to use all the help they could get, I was surprised to see that each dough skin was prepared by hand. It was final-kneaded and toss-stretched to size by a human dough handler, put on a screen, sauced per the order and passed to the cheese station.
I was there to drive, not make pizza, but, there was the secret desire. I had seen it on Television. I might have even seen a real pizza maker toss dough in the air and catch it. It looks fun, and one day, if things went well, I might even get to learn how to toss a dough. Someday. First, I had to get the delivery job, and be a good employee.
Turned out, all you had to do was have a valid license, insurance, a car, and be Eighteen. Stop next door at the copy shop, slap the items on a xerox, and you're hired. Here's your uniform shirt and hat and name tag. Blue slacks, no blue jeans and tennis shoes. Shower before work and wash your hands if you're in doubt.
It was my home town, and I had learned to drive there. With a big tank of a car, three on the tree and a 216 cu.in. engine, there was not much trouble I was going to get in to. That is, if the breaks work. The beast needed some pumping to get it to a stop, but other than that, pizza delivery wrapped in good old American Iron was a welcome sight. Just don't tap a British Convertible. Even though they were convicted of Insurance Fraud, it meant that I was going to be an inside employee if they would have me. And I knew they would.
During my first six months at Domino's, I had passed my phone test, and was expected to answer phones, take accurate orders, write neatly and post the tags to the make-line and get the other part affixed to the box. I would work later than other drivers, and got taught how to itemize pizzas. I even closed the store with the manager a number of times. I just wanted one thing: A shot at my two-minute pepperoni.
Once a quarter, Dave, the owner, would time people on making Pepperoni Pizzas. If you managed to make a saleable large pepperoni pizza in 120 seconds or less, you got a raise. It meant that you had what it takes to knock out a pizza. There were other factors too, of course. Just to give you the specifics, you had to start with a dough ball, kneed, shape and screen the dough. Put on the correct portion of sauce, and not go over the edges. Apply the correct amount of cheese, no time to use a scale, and then position 49-53 slices of pepperoni symmetrically on the pizza, such that it could be cut properly after cooking.
If you failed, you had to put the pepperoni back and save the skin for the next customer. You also had to wait until the next pay period before you would be eligible to try again, and even then, Dave had to be in a good mood. I had to take apart my first attempt. I was over the 2-minute mark by far. Two weeks later, I turned in a 93 second pizza, and we cooked it. That was, and always will be, the best pepperoni pizza I've ever had.
While I was hanging out in the small waiting area, waiting for a chance to chat with the manager. Frankly, I needed to pick up a second job at the time so I could save up the cash I needed to pay for my first semester in College. You see, I was going to have to enroll, and the Pizza gig might work well, since there was flexibility in the schedule. That, and the fact that getting up at false dawn every morning for my other job was just not going to work.
So I kept myself occupied, and learned the ordering code. I watched the slips move from the order sheet to the make-line and onto the boxes. An organization that is going to deliver pizza in under 30 minutes has to be exactly that: Organized. Expecting them to use all the help they could get, I was surprised to see that each dough skin was prepared by hand. It was final-kneaded and toss-stretched to size by a human dough handler, put on a screen, sauced per the order and passed to the cheese station.
I was there to drive, not make pizza, but, there was the secret desire. I had seen it on Television. I might have even seen a real pizza maker toss dough in the air and catch it. It looks fun, and one day, if things went well, I might even get to learn how to toss a dough. Someday. First, I had to get the delivery job, and be a good employee.
Turned out, all you had to do was have a valid license, insurance, a car, and be Eighteen. Stop next door at the copy shop, slap the items on a xerox, and you're hired. Here's your uniform shirt and hat and name tag. Blue slacks, no blue jeans and tennis shoes. Shower before work and wash your hands if you're in doubt.
It was my home town, and I had learned to drive there. With a big tank of a car, three on the tree and a 216 cu.in. engine, there was not much trouble I was going to get in to. That is, if the breaks work. The beast needed some pumping to get it to a stop, but other than that, pizza delivery wrapped in good old American Iron was a welcome sight. Just don't tap a British Convertible. Even though they were convicted of Insurance Fraud, it meant that I was going to be an inside employee if they would have me. And I knew they would.
During my first six months at Domino's, I had passed my phone test, and was expected to answer phones, take accurate orders, write neatly and post the tags to the make-line and get the other part affixed to the box. I would work later than other drivers, and got taught how to itemize pizzas. I even closed the store with the manager a number of times. I just wanted one thing: A shot at my two-minute pepperoni.
Once a quarter, Dave, the owner, would time people on making Pepperoni Pizzas. If you managed to make a saleable large pepperoni pizza in 120 seconds or less, you got a raise. It meant that you had what it takes to knock out a pizza. There were other factors too, of course. Just to give you the specifics, you had to start with a dough ball, kneed, shape and screen the dough. Put on the correct portion of sauce, and not go over the edges. Apply the correct amount of cheese, no time to use a scale, and then position 49-53 slices of pepperoni symmetrically on the pizza, such that it could be cut properly after cooking.
If you failed, you had to put the pepperoni back and save the skin for the next customer. You also had to wait until the next pay period before you would be eligible to try again, and even then, Dave had to be in a good mood. I had to take apart my first attempt. I was over the 2-minute mark by far. Two weeks later, I turned in a 93 second pizza, and we cooked it. That was, and always will be, the best pepperoni pizza I've ever had.
January 14, 2010
Manzano Poppers
This is my most ambitious post so far, and I am applying everything I've told you about blogging to bring you a Recipe Blog. Yes, I have seen so many posts that make me hungry, it's time for my revenge. So, here are my blurry pictures that I shot without a viewfinder, and hyper-fast video clip. Note that the formatting is likey to by rather whacked. I am not an HTML expert yet, so please bear with me as I just use the old editor. Without further ado:
The knife I am using is a 12cm paring knife, and it is very sharp.
I use grated Fontinella, and since it is fresh and sticky, it works very well in the peppers. This pepper does not have a nice septum covering it up, but it will wrap just the same. As long as the outside arc of skin is more than 90 degrees, you can stuff and wrap it. It may not be the most ideal thing, and much cheese may melt, away, but it will never be a waste.
Careful use of the toothpicks will secure the bacon in place. After the bacon starts to cook and fuse together, the toothpick is not as important. However, if you can get it to survive the grilling process, it makes a somewhat safe handle to manipulate the pepper by.
Cook over Medium-Low heat. Do not let flames encroach. After they begin to cook feel free to pour a lite coat of Agave or Honey, or whatever else you'd like to try. Experiment. After turning, coat again. Watch to make sure you don't have flare-ups do to burning sugar. If you do, move the pepper to a safer area. When in doubt, turn the poppers. I do not think you can turn them too much.
The idea is to slowly cook the bacon all the way around. The cheese will melt, don't worry about that. Some will escape. Grab a toothpick and snag the cheese. Even a small drip of cheese will lite up your life. Don't touch your eye. If you do, you are required to post your results here and tell us what happened.
Now, here's my problem. I can smell these things now. So, I have no choice but to spread the torture. For me, I can go make them. I can do them in the dark with an LED flashlight if have have to. I'm feeling a bit lazy. So, to enjoy the torture, just watch the clip below.
Oh yea. Time for a cautionary note. Capsicum Oil will atomize in the steam and smoke in a closed grill. While a closed grill is optimum for cooking Manzano Poppers, it is a pepper spray bomb waiting to be unleashed. Turn your head away from the grill when you open it. This is a mistake you will make only once, and then, your anxiousness will be tempered by the memory of the pain. Consider yourself warned.
I decided that the poppers needed another coat of Agave. They are basically done at this point.
Gas Grilled Manzano Poppers
(um, can I get a larger font?)
Above, you will see a montage of the ingredients we're going to use, except for one. Did I mention that I don't have a viewfinder on the camera? I've played with a number of cheeses, and since it is going to melt, you want one that melts well, and sticks together. It also needs enough taste to tell you "cheese" before, well, you encounter the power of the Manzano. For this, I have chosen Fontinella.
Buried as the backdrop, you can make out the premium center cut bacon. Note, don't get thick cut bacon for this. It won't work well. Get the leanest, oddly shaped, center cut bacon. Short strips are OK, and you're not serving these for the bacon anyway. It's really window-dressing to entice your prey please your guests. It also helps to absorb some of the heat from the pepper. Yes, after cooking, peeling and eating just the bacon will lite your fire.
Ingredients
- One or more Manzano Peppers ($13.99/lb@Vons)
- Premium Center Cut Bacon, Regular Cut (not thick)
- Fontinella Cheese (or multi-cheese melty blend)
- Blue Agave Sweetner (or Honey in a bottle)
Since this is a bacon-wrapped desert appetizer you'll need toothpicks to secure the bacon to itself. I strongly suggest Bamboo Toothpicks. Not because they are environmentally correct, and are not made from trees, but because they work better.
Because they are Bamboo, they slide through the bacon (and into the pepper if need be) without grabbing and tearing like a Birch toothpick will. If you can get Bamboo Toothpicks, do so.
Here are the four peppers that we are going to get prepared and grilled. Each pepper will yield between 2 and 4 poppers, depending on how it is segmented. The pepper in the bottom left corner is triple segmented, having three septa. The rest are double septa peppers. You can tell by shining a bright light into the side wall and looking at the ends of the pepper to see what lights up.
For a three-lobed or tri-septa pepper, the goal is to bisect the septum (split the membrane) on each of the three segments. This, of course, takes three cuts. Here are three horrible photos of the three cuts. Look to the stem to see the angle. Note the depth.
The knife I am using is a 12cm paring knife, and it is very sharp.
For double chamber peppers, cut opposite the septa, to make a pair of halves, and once you can see the septa, split the halves into quarters by splitting the septa.
After the third cut, gently pry the segments apart from the bottom. You will need to make sure that all three cuts intersect at the base of the pepper. This is why it looks a little deep. It is.
And you will get three pieces, that are 90% sealed up, and almost resemble apple slices. This may be one of the reasons that "Manzano" has been translated to "Apple." The hottest part of the pepper is right next to the seeds. Preserve this if, if you're lucky, on the stemmed piece. Remember to give the stemmed pepper to a friend, and try not to blush when you do.
Use the tip of the very sharp knife to both incise into the pockets and to knock the seeds off of the central spire. Take care to hold the pepper by the outer edges. Use Nitrile or Latex gloves (powder free) if you have sensitive skin. Try NOT to touch the septa (membranes) or central pepper stem with your fingers.
Shake the seeds out of the pockets. Save the seeds for someone with a green thumb. Do not give this person a stemmed popper.
Add a small amount of Blue Agave Sweetener, or a slightly smaller amount of honey. This will add an initial sweet taste to the stuffing and prevent any early pepper pungency that can discourage timid guests. Since Manzano Peppers are up to 10 times hotter than a Jalapeno, a little regulation on the heat does not hurt.
Shake the seeds out of the pockets. Save the seeds for someone with a green thumb. Do not give this person a stemmed popper.
Add a small amount of Blue Agave Sweetener, or a slightly smaller amount of honey. This will add an initial sweet taste to the stuffing and prevent any early pepper pungency that can discourage timid guests. Since Manzano Peppers are up to 10 times hotter than a Jalapeno, a little regulation on the heat does not hurt.
I use grated Fontinella, and since it is fresh and sticky, it works very well in the peppers. This pepper does not have a nice septum covering it up, but it will wrap just the same. As long as the outside arc of skin is more than 90 degrees, you can stuff and wrap it. It may not be the most ideal thing, and much cheese may melt, away, but it will never be a waste.
Careful use of the toothpicks will secure the bacon in place. After the bacon starts to cook and fuse together, the toothpick is not as important. However, if you can get it to survive the grilling process, it makes a somewhat safe handle to manipulate the pepper by.
Cook over Medium-Low heat. Do not let flames encroach. After they begin to cook feel free to pour a lite coat of Agave or Honey, or whatever else you'd like to try. Experiment. After turning, coat again. Watch to make sure you don't have flare-ups do to burning sugar. If you do, move the pepper to a safer area. When in doubt, turn the poppers. I do not think you can turn them too much.
The idea is to slowly cook the bacon all the way around. The cheese will melt, don't worry about that. Some will escape. Grab a toothpick and snag the cheese. Even a small drip of cheese will lite up your life. Don't touch your eye. If you do, you are required to post your results here and tell us what happened.
Now, here's my problem. I can smell these things now. So, I have no choice but to spread the torture. For me, I can go make them. I can do them in the dark with an LED flashlight if have have to. I'm feeling a bit lazy. So, to enjoy the torture, just watch the clip below.
I decided that the poppers needed another coat of Agave. They are basically done at this point.
Now, I turn the heat down to low and place a piece of folded foil on the bun-rack. As the poppers complete their cooking (yes, they are all different) onto the sheet they go for storage. It is sometimes necessary to prop one pepper on another to get the right area to cook. Bacon should be properly cooked, and in this case, just this side of crispy.
That's it. I'm done with this post, and I can not stand it any more. I am just happy that I've still got one of these fourteen poppers left. They will keep for a long time in the fridge, and they are fantastic cold, warm, re-heated on the bun warmer the next day, etc.
Just don't use a microwave.
January 8, 2010
Treasure Chests and Coffers
Now I get the chance to tinker with a video upload. I've owned a small ball-camera for some time, and have been accumulating some interesting bits of video. While many of the files are much larger than the 100 Megabyte limit for video files here on Blogger, I do have some short clips like this one:
This is all in camera, no editing, and surveillance quality. Note, there is no viewfinder on this camera, so it takes some time and attention to guess at the shot you're getting. Regardless, it's a little movie, akin to the old Super8 movies that the upper middle class of the 70's used.
[Editor's note: after the upload, it was not available for a short while, and now somehow it's 1/2 as long as it orignally was. There are some edits. The gist is still there, and this compression was quite unexpected. Was this done by machine or human?]
Just a note, that via cable-modem, this 20MB file took a few minutes to upload. The nice thing is that I was able to keep writing while the video was uploaded. Now, the Blogger site is "Processing Video" as I continue to write. Pretty cool. After a little while, I expect that the frame will appear frozen under the Play Icon.
Now, I've never done this before, so we'll see how this goes. Looks finished. Yes, the date in the corner is accurate. Normally, on the 5th of July, the alleys in my beach community are overrun with "canners" that have no compunction from stealing from city owned recycling bins (the blue ones) and from the private refuse company containers that also accept recyclables and separate them at their facility.
After several complaints and gathering some grass-roots support, we got our end of the alley cleaned up, and we no longer have stinking, loud, poorly exhausted vehicles with cigarette smoking, urinating in the alley people rummaging through the cans, climbing in the dumpster and using our shaded parking spaces to crush cans at 0530.
Frankly, it's bad enough that I have to listed to the trash going into the cans in the evening, I prefer not to be awakened early on a Sunday morning loud clinking glass and crushing cans coming out of the bins and into hand held trash bags, that have been harvested from the cans too. Most people are aware that all trash in this city must be bagged before disposal. The canners don't care - they see the empty bag as valuable, and they have emptied the contents just to get one or two redeemable bottles or cans.
After you see the video, you'll know how it got handled. Today, things are not this neat, and we have to get the neighbor to put their single family cans back after they are emptied on Mondays.
Formatting tip: Upload the video, write the text, drag the video down to where you want it, and while it is selected, hit the "center justify" icon to move it to the center of the post window. Grab a corner of the video image to adjust the size. I messed up the aspect ratio, so I had to upload the video a second time. Gaak.
On the second upload, it is at the end of the post, so I will drag it upward to where I want it. I am going to leave it in the default format, since I think my camera is 320x240. Being able to control the magnification and aspect ration would be nice. Yes, you can re-position the video in the post while it is uploading and processing.
On another note, the upload policy was not displayed when the link in the upload dialog box was clicked. I am pretty sure I know what it says, and I am in compliance since I shot the video, own the copyright, and there is nothing obscene. Trashy, yes. Obscene, No.
I shot another short video with the same kind of camera, and donated it to another blogger, since it pertains directly to their blog. Feel free to click the link you just read over and look for it.
Have fun!
January 2, 2010
Small, Medium and Large
The Mountains of Sierra VistaI followed my rule, and uploaded the images in reverse, order, selecting small (left), medium (right) and large (center) as my placement options. I put the banner at the top because I know someone who wants a copy. I plan to make a better copy of it. I selected the best 400 pixels, since I know that the Large size is 400 pixels wide.
You have to hit the down arrow to get to the region to the right of the photo below. It appears that I have found the space to the right of the second image. Yes, this is making the final image go downward. The image at the left is a small left placement at 200 pixels wide. The image uploaded was 640 wide, so it got a bit crisper as a result.
This line will be to the left of the medium 320 pixel wide image. This one was also 640 pixels wide, but I did crop out some of the upper and lower portions. From these dawn photos of the desert just west of the 92 Highway in Southern Arizona, there are some elements of beauty to be had, but you have to look close and through the bushes to find it.I managed to make a few mistakes along the way, one of which was using the delete key to delete forward, which deleted one of the photos that I had uploaded. This may be why the small one is in the middle. They are of dessert, so it really does not make much of a difference what the order is.
By allowing for such a mistake to occur, I can keep the time to a minimum. I did this, and now, I know that the resolutions are 200, 320 and 400 pixels for small, medium and large photographs. Handy information to have, and from the quality of the images I've been able to eek from my security camera, I have to say that the small image looks the best. While the camera shots 640x480 images, they're not the clearest images in the world.
Now that I've tinkered with photos, I have to say I like them allot. It is now going to be a challenge to get photos of the quality that I believe necessary before I really start using them in a blog. Some of the photo blogs out there are very high quality images.
December 28, 2009
Uploading Photos
I'm sitting here with another blogger, who is quite interested in getting photos into their post pages. Since I've only done it once, and saw a number of options, I've decided to write a tutorial so that I really only have to explain it once, at the time I do it.
Since my blogger friend was nice enough to have me over, I shot a few photos in the back yard that give me enough material to write about, so that we can experiment with the different sizes and formatting options.
Yes, I know you were expecting a post about the final "W" in the 5-W's and 1-H series, called "Why" but it's pretty safe to presume that you already know why you want to write a blog in the first place, therefore, I leave this one up to you unless you scream, yell, and absolutely insist that I put my two-cents out there for all to critique. Comments welcome.
As for the photos, there is a simple little photo icon that allows you to upload a photo right into your post. If you're using the "old editor" here on Blogspot, its located to the right of the spell check icon. Once more spot to the right looks like a piece of movie film. They tell me that it's the video upload button, and perhaps I'll get to it one day. For now, we focus on the photos. When you hover over the correct button, the "tool tip" will read "Add Image."
The Blogger Add Image function accepts J-Peg (JPG), graphic interchange format (GIF), bitmap picture (BMP) and portable network graphics (PNG) formats. You can browse your hard disk and upload an image of 8MB or smaller, or you can browse the web and link to an external URL that points to the image. Uploading an image will prevent a broken link from wrecking your page, so I suggest this option. The limit on image uploads is controlled by your Google Picasa Images account. Click on the question mark icon in the Add Image dialog to learn more.There are four option for formatting your image. None, Left, Center and Right. I'll play with these a bit, but the left and right options allow the text to flow alongside the image. There are also three size options available. Small, Medium and Large. Details now follow, but for now, let's just use a centered large image and see what we get.
Unexpectedly, the image uploaded at the top of the page, and activated the line-spacing bug in the old editor. I was able to hover my cursor over the image and get the four-way arrow icon, indicating that I could drag the image to where I wished within the post. I pulled it to the bottom, and from the Preview screen, determined that my 640x480 image was reduced to a 400x300 pixel image. It is suggested that your horizontal image size match the image size (in this case, 400 pixels) so that resolution reduction artifacts do not spoil your picture. Here is the best 400 pixels from the same image.
This time, I selected the left formatting option. This time too, the image did not upload at the expected cursor position, so I had to drag it down to where I wanted it to be. Uploading the image activated the spacing bug again, so I've decided to call this part 1 of 2 (or more parts) and give you more details in the next post.
From what I've just discovered about this interface, It is best to select your image(s) first, crop them to the desired size and then upload them into your post, in reverse order, last image first, first image last. Get the images in place and then add the text. You'll save a lot of time a frustration.
Note that there were not too many resolution reduction issues with the first image. I'm actually happier with the clarity of the original image that was reduced, that the best 400 pixels that I selected. Based on this, go with what you need, pick the formatting options, upload the picture and then start writing.
The formatting in this editor is driving me nuts, and more experimentation is necessary before a good multi-image posting method is created. I will share it with you as I have the opportunity
Have Fun!
(Note: I had to edit the HTML directly to correct the spacing formatting, and the "div" tags were unexpectedly replaced with "p" tags when more text is added. If you have any advice, I'm really ready to read it, as is my blogging friend.)
Since my blogger friend was nice enough to have me over, I shot a few photos in the back yard that give me enough material to write about, so that we can experiment with the different sizes and formatting options.
Yes, I know you were expecting a post about the final "W" in the 5-W's and 1-H series, called "Why" but it's pretty safe to presume that you already know why you want to write a blog in the first place, therefore, I leave this one up to you unless you scream, yell, and absolutely insist that I put my two-cents out there for all to critique. Comments welcome.
As for the photos, there is a simple little photo icon that allows you to upload a photo right into your post. If you're using the "old editor" here on Blogspot, its located to the right of the spell check icon. Once more spot to the right looks like a piece of movie film. They tell me that it's the video upload button, and perhaps I'll get to it one day. For now, we focus on the photos. When you hover over the correct button, the "tool tip" will read "Add Image."
The Blogger Add Image function accepts J-Peg (JPG), graphic interchange format (GIF), bitmap picture (BMP) and portable network graphics (PNG) formats. You can browse your hard disk and upload an image of 8MB or smaller, or you can browse the web and link to an external URL that points to the image. Uploading an image will prevent a broken link from wrecking your page, so I suggest this option. The limit on image uploads is controlled by your Google Picasa Images account. Click on the question mark icon in the Add Image dialog to learn more.There are four option for formatting your image. None, Left, Center and Right. I'll play with these a bit, but the left and right options allow the text to flow alongside the image. There are also three size options available. Small, Medium and Large. Details now follow, but for now, let's just use a centered large image and see what we get.
Unexpectedly, the image uploaded at the top of the page, and activated the line-spacing bug in the old editor. I was able to hover my cursor over the image and get the four-way arrow icon, indicating that I could drag the image to where I wished within the post. I pulled it to the bottom, and from the Preview screen, determined that my 640x480 image was reduced to a 400x300 pixel image. It is suggested that your horizontal image size match the image size (in this case, 400 pixels) so that resolution reduction artifacts do not spoil your picture. Here is the best 400 pixels from the same image.
This time, I selected the left formatting option. This time too, the image did not upload at the expected cursor position, so I had to drag it down to where I wanted it to be. Uploading the image activated the spacing bug again, so I've decided to call this part 1 of 2 (or more parts) and give you more details in the next post.From what I've just discovered about this interface, It is best to select your image(s) first, crop them to the desired size and then upload them into your post, in reverse order, last image first, first image last. Get the images in place and then add the text. You'll save a lot of time a frustration.
Note that there were not too many resolution reduction issues with the first image. I'm actually happier with the clarity of the original image that was reduced, that the best 400 pixels that I selected. Based on this, go with what you need, pick the formatting options, upload the picture and then start writing.
The formatting in this editor is driving me nuts, and more experimentation is necessary before a good multi-image posting method is created. I will share it with you as I have the opportunity
Have Fun!
(Note: I had to edit the HTML directly to correct the spacing formatting, and the "div" tags were unexpectedly replaced with "p" tags when more text is added. If you have any advice, I'm really ready to read it, as is my blogging friend.)
December 22, 2009
Who
The "Who" of blogging can be as simple as you and I. You are the reader and I am the author. You read what I write. Unfortunately, most authors don't look at this in such simple terms, preferring to replace the You with Audience, and the I with "The Writer."
I can go with the Audience thing, since you have the potential to reach more than one person with a Blog, but I still like to think personally when it comes to blogging, since there is really only one reader at a time. There is no feedback or crowd reaction from the presence of a mass of humanity gathered in one place to simultaneously experience your communicative efforts.
But there are comments, you say. The audience can interact with each other, and provide a group dynamic. And yes, I will tell you that it is true, but its only an audience in the basic sense in that they have read your words, not been present for a performance. I suppose that is the major difference, in that Performance and Audience are linked in my mind.
The main purpose for an Author to have some concept of audience in mind, is so that they can direct their efforts at a known class of persons, with particular faculties and reasoning skills. It would do little good to create a work that is not targeted. As was touched on in the previous post, the audience plays a significant role in the choice of words and writing techniques that an Author may choose to deploy in the effort of communication.
Did I just loose you there? What I over your head with "deploy in the effort?" What was I aiming at with those words, a military crowd? Sure. That might be right, but at the same time, I might also claim that we are engaged in a literary war, and words are our weapons with which we assail the masses with seeds of ideas and ideals.
Ug. I don't want to know where that just came from, but I seem to remember one author in particular by the name of Joe Orton. He was English, at least while he was alive. I had to study this writer of English Literature in college, having no clue that the word English would refer to England and not the language in general. I would still hate writing at the end of my English Literature experience.
The idea of "You" as an author is about as good as any when it comes to blogging. Most of the blogs that I've encountered (meaning 50% plus one) are written by a single writer, most of the time. This should be true for most of the personal bloggers in the "here's my life" category, barring some kind of mental illness, psychosis, demonic possession, or chemical influence. Note that none of these are considered impairments to becoming a successful author.
In rare instances, a cadre of authors will band together to create a larger blog than one sane person would manage. I would have a tough time creating posts of this length on a daily basis, given the fact that I am regularly employed and do not mix my blogging activity with company time. Professional writers should have little trouble with such a task, as they commonly measure their output in column-inches.
When it comes to the educational level, I have no problem with setting a minimum somewhere between High School and College. High School Sophomore is about as low a level as I would think appropriate for the Internet, and it only goes up from there. You can aim as high as you like on the Internet, and there will be somebody, someday, somewhere, that gets it.
As far as my daily blog project goes, I try to keep the vocabulary level as far up the scale as the storyline permits. There are also limitations that are imposed by the period in which the current sequence of posts is set. I had to establish a rule that would not allow a term to be introduced that was not appropriate at the time. This has produced some very strange posts, pushing the fictional aspect of the work into some strange and interesting niches. The good news is that I can write new things in, provided they are supported by the historical record.
Perhaps you will create a blog that is not bound by such odd and strange rules. I can't say how it happened that I would choose such a subject, but it happened and I started and now I have to keep going. I've managed to acquire a small audience of more than a dozen regular readers, and that's huge considering that I'm a relative newcomer to the blogosphere, having done it for a mere three months.
As a user of Google Analytics and Feedburner, I am able to see a fairly anonymous listing of who is visiting my site and how many feed subscribers I have. I can see hits by city with Analytics, and feed readers by country with Feedburner. It should be no surprise that most of my readers are in the United States, as my blogs are in English. Even with all of this, and some loyal subscribers, I've had a string of zero-hit days, but that's to be expected, especially with the holidays upon us.
While it may be true that you have a certain number of readers today, tomorrow there are more potential readers. Every day, new minds get connected to the Internet for the first time, and we know that they will never leave. The high degree of preservation that digital publishing offers, ensures that your writings will not go the way of the Dead Sea Scrolls. What you write today, will likely outlast you, and the next seven generations. Your blog is more than just something to do, it can become a vital touchstone to future generations in a way that mankind had only dreamed of, until yesterday.
I can go with the Audience thing, since you have the potential to reach more than one person with a Blog, but I still like to think personally when it comes to blogging, since there is really only one reader at a time. There is no feedback or crowd reaction from the presence of a mass of humanity gathered in one place to simultaneously experience your communicative efforts.
But there are comments, you say. The audience can interact with each other, and provide a group dynamic. And yes, I will tell you that it is true, but its only an audience in the basic sense in that they have read your words, not been present for a performance. I suppose that is the major difference, in that Performance and Audience are linked in my mind.
The main purpose for an Author to have some concept of audience in mind, is so that they can direct their efforts at a known class of persons, with particular faculties and reasoning skills. It would do little good to create a work that is not targeted. As was touched on in the previous post, the audience plays a significant role in the choice of words and writing techniques that an Author may choose to deploy in the effort of communication.
Did I just loose you there? What I over your head with "deploy in the effort?" What was I aiming at with those words, a military crowd? Sure. That might be right, but at the same time, I might also claim that we are engaged in a literary war, and words are our weapons with which we assail the masses with seeds of ideas and ideals.
Ug. I don't want to know where that just came from, but I seem to remember one author in particular by the name of Joe Orton. He was English, at least while he was alive. I had to study this writer of English Literature in college, having no clue that the word English would refer to England and not the language in general. I would still hate writing at the end of my English Literature experience.
The idea of "You" as an author is about as good as any when it comes to blogging. Most of the blogs that I've encountered (meaning 50% plus one) are written by a single writer, most of the time. This should be true for most of the personal bloggers in the "here's my life" category, barring some kind of mental illness, psychosis, demonic possession, or chemical influence. Note that none of these are considered impairments to becoming a successful author.
In rare instances, a cadre of authors will band together to create a larger blog than one sane person would manage. I would have a tough time creating posts of this length on a daily basis, given the fact that I am regularly employed and do not mix my blogging activity with company time. Professional writers should have little trouble with such a task, as they commonly measure their output in column-inches.
When it comes to the educational level, I have no problem with setting a minimum somewhere between High School and College. High School Sophomore is about as low a level as I would think appropriate for the Internet, and it only goes up from there. You can aim as high as you like on the Internet, and there will be somebody, someday, somewhere, that gets it.
As far as my daily blog project goes, I try to keep the vocabulary level as far up the scale as the storyline permits. There are also limitations that are imposed by the period in which the current sequence of posts is set. I had to establish a rule that would not allow a term to be introduced that was not appropriate at the time. This has produced some very strange posts, pushing the fictional aspect of the work into some strange and interesting niches. The good news is that I can write new things in, provided they are supported by the historical record.
Perhaps you will create a blog that is not bound by such odd and strange rules. I can't say how it happened that I would choose such a subject, but it happened and I started and now I have to keep going. I've managed to acquire a small audience of more than a dozen regular readers, and that's huge considering that I'm a relative newcomer to the blogosphere, having done it for a mere three months.
As a user of Google Analytics and Feedburner, I am able to see a fairly anonymous listing of who is visiting my site and how many feed subscribers I have. I can see hits by city with Analytics, and feed readers by country with Feedburner. It should be no surprise that most of my readers are in the United States, as my blogs are in English. Even with all of this, and some loyal subscribers, I've had a string of zero-hit days, but that's to be expected, especially with the holidays upon us.
While it may be true that you have a certain number of readers today, tomorrow there are more potential readers. Every day, new minds get connected to the Internet for the first time, and we know that they will never leave. The high degree of preservation that digital publishing offers, ensures that your writings will not go the way of the Dead Sea Scrolls. What you write today, will likely outlast you, and the next seven generations. Your blog is more than just something to do, it can become a vital touchstone to future generations in a way that mankind had only dreamed of, until yesterday.
December 16, 2009
What
It's all about the subject, says the word "what." This is the core of any blog, the central thread that ties everything together and gives the collection of writings a focus and purpose. It is definitely worthwhile to perform any form of prewriting exercise, like clustering, a list of keywords, an outline of subject matter, etc. In the process of prewriting, you will begin to sew the seeds that grow into the fountain of material from which you can draw. If the prewriting does not get your creative juices flowing, refine your subject and try again.
I will admit that I did not perform this step on paper when I conceived of my daily blog. I had been considering starting a blog, on any number of subjects. Some of these subjects are still suitable for blogging, but they are far more personal. When I began to consider the audience and the potency of the work required, I decided that like other blogs, I too would rebel in some way.
Personally, I find that while writing, I have to back things down a notch, and aim for one or more of several distinct audiences. One audience is highly intelligent and technical, but has limits to understanding and comprehension of the English language. The basic structure for this group is simple sentences with a splattering of understandable high-technology terms. Lucky for me that I can use mathematics and computational languages to supplement my writing for this group, or there would be no joy. This is not a standard audience, by any means. The other groups are fairly standard, and should be considered when aiming your writing at an audience.
The most basic level of writing is Newspaper class. Read any story on CNN, or in any newspaper or teen magazine, and you will quickly understand this level of communication. Semi-redundant, catchy, flashy, with a bit of spark and spiff, but the total vocabulary and structure is easily followable by pre-teens and sixth-graders. Yes, this is the level that most city-beat reporters and journalists aim for. It is a very wide audience, and when in doubt, aim for it, since all other audiences are a subset of this one.
As educational level increases, the starting vocabulary may expand appropriately. There is quite a difference in vocabulary between High School and College, and it is the graduates of these two educational phases that define the next strata of writing. A College graduate is not easily confused by the construction of a rhetorical question, whereas a newspaper would never print one due to the ensuing confusion. College graduates who have studied English as their focus, learn that the language can be re-defined in-context, and as a result, can lob words as weapons to unsettling effect and torment of others.
While it may seem that your target audience would really fall under the category of who, and you may be correct (I put the who tag on this entry just to please you), it so heavily influences what you are writing, that it can not be left behind. Unlike the sadistic English major, your job is to lob words into the mind of the reader that communicate what you want to say, in a manner that generates interest in the subject and furthers the growth of readership. You don't publish something to put it on the shelf and look at the pretty leather wrapper.
What you are writing about may be keyed to where you are writing from. Laptop and ultra-mobile computers allow up-close and personal styles of blogging, since you can immerse yourself in the environment and write. A travel blog, updated on-the-road, might be a good immersive experience blog, if you are a frequent traveller and have access to the source material. In this case, you are also bringing your experience, that snapshot of time, to the rest of the world that may happen upon your writings today or tomorrow's tomorrow.
The subject of your blog is the ultimate key to what you will be writing. It is suggested that this subject be distilled into a one, two or perhaps a three sentence description, which you will need for the description segment of your blog header. While you want the description to be broad enough to cover a range of material, it is just as helpful to have limits and boundaries that help maintain focus. If you find yourself with material that does not fit your theme, then perhaps you have the seed for another blog.
While I am impressed with some of twitteresque blogs that answer the question "What are you doing?" it quickly becomes yet another example of the human experience. Yes, it is interesting to see what parts of people's lives and experiences they are willing to put out for the world to see, but it is still premeditated. Note the embedding of the word 'edit' smack in the middle of premeditated. Only your brain has the complete record, and anything you post is therefore, an edited recollection. Believe it or not, this is a very good thing.
Perhaps you have a great idea for a blog subject, and you're ready for the challenge. What does the Internet have to say about that idea already? Pull up to a search engine or three, and pound on the input box. Type in the core of your blog idea, several different ways like you might do if you were a potential reader. Did relevant things come up on the first page? If so, this is your competition. This is what you will be compared to. This is the crowd to which you will become the leader or just another me-too.
If you are writing just to write, or to have a place to point people to, then your competition does not matter. You are doing your thing in your little wisp of the cloud, and you can send anyone in the world there who wants to go there. You also have a non-zero probability of discovery, and unless you say otherwise, the automated web-bots will read your writing, perform analysis on the HTML code and links to and from the pages of your blog to the rest of the web.
However, there are certain advantages to filling a niche. If your search session does not pull up compelling references to your subject, and there is little or no competition, you are lucky indeed and should seize upon the opportunity. Do double check your work. As a final search test, enclose all or part of your keywords in quotes to provide a tighter match, looking for word pairs or triples, in order.
Uniqueness is often the key to great reward, provided that you can maintain and enhance your position. You must work to establish and enhance your position, and while Copyright law protects your rights, you need to have something worth copying before those rights need to be enforced. If you can fill the search niche you discover with a blog that you will enjoy creating, you've got a fantastic opportunity.
I will admit that I did not perform this step on paper when I conceived of my daily blog. I had been considering starting a blog, on any number of subjects. Some of these subjects are still suitable for blogging, but they are far more personal. When I began to consider the audience and the potency of the work required, I decided that like other blogs, I too would rebel in some way.
Personally, I find that while writing, I have to back things down a notch, and aim for one or more of several distinct audiences. One audience is highly intelligent and technical, but has limits to understanding and comprehension of the English language. The basic structure for this group is simple sentences with a splattering of understandable high-technology terms. Lucky for me that I can use mathematics and computational languages to supplement my writing for this group, or there would be no joy. This is not a standard audience, by any means. The other groups are fairly standard, and should be considered when aiming your writing at an audience.
The most basic level of writing is Newspaper class. Read any story on CNN, or in any newspaper or teen magazine, and you will quickly understand this level of communication. Semi-redundant, catchy, flashy, with a bit of spark and spiff, but the total vocabulary and structure is easily followable by pre-teens and sixth-graders. Yes, this is the level that most city-beat reporters and journalists aim for. It is a very wide audience, and when in doubt, aim for it, since all other audiences are a subset of this one.
As educational level increases, the starting vocabulary may expand appropriately. There is quite a difference in vocabulary between High School and College, and it is the graduates of these two educational phases that define the next strata of writing. A College graduate is not easily confused by the construction of a rhetorical question, whereas a newspaper would never print one due to the ensuing confusion. College graduates who have studied English as their focus, learn that the language can be re-defined in-context, and as a result, can lob words as weapons to unsettling effect and torment of others.
While it may seem that your target audience would really fall under the category of who, and you may be correct (I put the who tag on this entry just to please you), it so heavily influences what you are writing, that it can not be left behind. Unlike the sadistic English major, your job is to lob words into the mind of the reader that communicate what you want to say, in a manner that generates interest in the subject and furthers the growth of readership. You don't publish something to put it on the shelf and look at the pretty leather wrapper.
What you are writing about may be keyed to where you are writing from. Laptop and ultra-mobile computers allow up-close and personal styles of blogging, since you can immerse yourself in the environment and write. A travel blog, updated on-the-road, might be a good immersive experience blog, if you are a frequent traveller and have access to the source material. In this case, you are also bringing your experience, that snapshot of time, to the rest of the world that may happen upon your writings today or tomorrow's tomorrow.
The subject of your blog is the ultimate key to what you will be writing. It is suggested that this subject be distilled into a one, two or perhaps a three sentence description, which you will need for the description segment of your blog header. While you want the description to be broad enough to cover a range of material, it is just as helpful to have limits and boundaries that help maintain focus. If you find yourself with material that does not fit your theme, then perhaps you have the seed for another blog.
While I am impressed with some of twitteresque blogs that answer the question "What are you doing?" it quickly becomes yet another example of the human experience. Yes, it is interesting to see what parts of people's lives and experiences they are willing to put out for the world to see, but it is still premeditated. Note the embedding of the word 'edit' smack in the middle of premeditated. Only your brain has the complete record, and anything you post is therefore, an edited recollection. Believe it or not, this is a very good thing.
Perhaps you have a great idea for a blog subject, and you're ready for the challenge. What does the Internet have to say about that idea already? Pull up to a search engine or three, and pound on the input box. Type in the core of your blog idea, several different ways like you might do if you were a potential reader. Did relevant things come up on the first page? If so, this is your competition. This is what you will be compared to. This is the crowd to which you will become the leader or just another me-too.
If you are writing just to write, or to have a place to point people to, then your competition does not matter. You are doing your thing in your little wisp of the cloud, and you can send anyone in the world there who wants to go there. You also have a non-zero probability of discovery, and unless you say otherwise, the automated web-bots will read your writing, perform analysis on the HTML code and links to and from the pages of your blog to the rest of the web.
However, there are certain advantages to filling a niche. If your search session does not pull up compelling references to your subject, and there is little or no competition, you are lucky indeed and should seize upon the opportunity. Do double check your work. As a final search test, enclose all or part of your keywords in quotes to provide a tighter match, looking for word pairs or triples, in order.
Uniqueness is often the key to great reward, provided that you can maintain and enhance your position. You must work to establish and enhance your position, and while Copyright law protects your rights, you need to have something worth copying before those rights need to be enforced. If you can fill the search niche you discover with a blog that you will enjoy creating, you've got a fantastic opportunity.
